Well maybe this will help people understand me and my HA (Health Anxiety).
Thinking back to when I was younger I can remember trapping my thumb in a door and my nail went black and I panicked and asked my Mum if it had ever happened to her cause I was convinced I was going to die! I can only think that from an early age I've heard something that has put it in my head about dying .... my brother got a brain Tumor at 15, I was 6..... thankfully it was benign but I think it must stem from this.
Only recently has my HA gotten worse to the point where on a daily basis I'm having panic attacks, even though I try to rationalise these thoughts and tell myself "You're having a panic attack everything is fine" in the back of my head I'm thinking "Or am I? What if I am actually having the onset of a heart attack"!!
I don't know much about the help that is out there for people who suffer with HA but thanks to www.nomorepanic.co.uk I know that I am not alone.
I wish my family could be more supportive and not call me a drama queen all the time or roll their eyes when I am looking for reassurance but I guess they just don't understand and it's something I have to deal with.
Believe me family .... I do my own head in!!!
OK this has been a welcome "distraction" and my breathing is now getting easier so I will end it here for today but I will probably pop back on tomorrow.
For anyone with HA reading this please go to www.nomorepanic.co.uk and know you are never alone.
Kirsty xxxx
Today I have tight chest and still feel like I'm on a boat
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